03 Jun 2016

Quickpost: addicted to meaningless jargon

This is a great article about one journalist's experiences in the RISE conference.

“We visually organize your email and cloud-based content for ultra fast access,” says Kalpesh, reading from his promotional materials. “It’s visual storytelling with any type of content.”

Say what? What does this thingy do? I have no clue.

Apparently I'm not alone. Luckily, article author translated it to plain English:

Translation: Cubes is actually an app that pinpoints anything that’s not plain-Jane text in your email or Dropbox accounts (a photograph, an excel file, a YouTube video), takes snapshots of those things, and then bundles them together in a standalone app.

OK, now I get it. Thanks! smile

However, the sad thing is, it's not just startups. If you're working in a large company, you've probably seen these kinds of emails sent by your pointy-haired bosses. They are stuck in their bubbles talking about "disruption", "alignment" and "engagement". How about this:

To ensure synergies and alignment between the finance strategy and business needs, Mr.X will co-operate closely with all finance functional leads, including aligning closely with Mr.Y and his team to ensure the consistent dissemination of financial information.

No, I really don't know why our company is going to pay $100k a year to this guy. Do you?